


Our Unsinkable Love

by MooseandTrickster



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Titanic Fusion, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Tragedy, Complete, F/M, Human Balthazar (Supernatural), Human Castiel, Human Gabriel (Supernatural), M/M, Sabriel AU, Sabriel titanic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-18 18:24:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14219058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MooseandTrickster/pseuds/MooseandTrickster
Summary: Sam Winchester receives a ticket to go on the maiden voyage of the RMS Titanic.Gabriel Novak works on the Titanic with one of his older brother's, Balthazar.In a world where to love another person of the same gender is considered abnormal, even looked down upon with hate and disgust by everyone, Sam and Gabriel struggle to keep their growing feelings, and eventual relationship, hidden from view.For if someone were to find out, Gabe would lose his job and both would face possible imprisonment if they were unlucky.But when someone finds out about their hidden love, Sam and Gabriel think nothing could ever be worse.When the ship hits an iceberg and sinks into the icy sea, everyone faces a terrifying fate as they battle to stay alive.





	1. One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Hey guys! This is the first fic I've published on here and I'll try to post at least once a week until it's finished :D I usually post on Wattpad but I've been wanting to try this site for a while, I hope you enjoy this fic!~

10TH April 1912

9:30 am

 

Sam Winchester sat on the edge of his bed, nervously picking at the rough fabric of his blanket as he bags stood packed in the corner.

In his hand, he held the letter that he still couldn't believe was meant for him. In his other hand, he held a ticket for passage on the maiden voyage of the RMS Titanic herself.

 

"Sam? Are you ready?" Dean, Sam's older brother asked.

Sam knew Dean wasn't all that pleased that Sam was going on this trip, but who would turn down such an opportunity?

Their little brother Adam was peeking out from around the corner, his light brown hair that was identical to Dean's was sticking out in all directions.

 

"Of course, will you and Adam be all right while I am gone?" Sam asks, holding out his arms to his younger brother.

Little Adam ran up, his small hands grabbing onto Sam's shoulders as he was lifted up. Only 7 years old, Adam was actually able to go to school instead of working thanks to their uncle Bobby, who was paying for it since their parents had been killed.

 Dean huffs, but lifts Sam's worn duffel bag and shoulders it. Sam grabs his trunk with one hand, holding Adam on his hip with the other. They walk out of the silent house to where the car sat waiting.

"Will you be gone long, Sammy?" Adam asks.

Sam shook his head, "I promise I'll only be in America for a short time, then I will come straight back here to you two."

"Promise?" Adam tilted his head.

"I promise, who else would I rather be with than you and Dean?"

Adam smiled toothily at this, letting Sam put him down as the taller man puts his trunk into the trunk. They all pile into the vehicle and Dean drives them to the harbour, a worried look in his eyes.

 

Adam all but fell out of the car excitedly as they pulled up near the large ship. His eyes were as large as saucers as he grabs Sam's hand and excitedly pointed up at the RMS Titanic. Dean used his hand to shade his eyes from the bright sun as he looked up at the ship and let out a low whistle.

"Wow Sammy, that sure is something."

"Are you going on that big ship!?" Adam asked excitedly.

"Sure am big guy," Sam ruffles Adam's hair, feeling a sense of bittersweetness as he crouches down. "I'll be back before you know it."

Standing up, Sam faces his older brother and smiles hesitantly. "I guess I'll see you when I get back," Sam plays with the strap of the duffel bag in his hand.

"Hey, Sammy," Dean placed a hand on his younger brother's shoulder. "Stay safe, alright? I know they call it the unsinkable ship for a reason, but there are also people you'll be dealing with and it’s a whole new world over there..."

"I'll be fine Dean," Sam rolls his eyes at his brother's protectiveness. "I'm 21, not 12."

Dean chuckles, "yeah, well still, stay safe kiddo." Dean steps forward and pulls Sam into a hug, causing the taller man to drop his bag.

Wrapping his arms around his brother, Sam chuckles in return. "Maybe I should be telling you to stay out of trouble, jerk."

"Sure bitch."

A few people cast them looks of distaste at their choice of language, but for the most part, they were ignored, invisible in the thriving crowd.

Shouldering his duffel bag and lifting his trunk, Sam offers his brother's a half smile. "Bye guys, I'll see you in two months, and I'll contact you as soon as I get to New York."

Adam waved energetically, despite the brimming tears in his eyes. Dean was waving as well, half-heartedly as he continued to watch his little brother in worry.

Sam swallows nervously and turns away, melding into the crowd almost instantly as he makes his way to the boarding line. The people milling around him were loud, smoke drifted from the glowing ends of cigars, and children ran around waving flags. 

Shouldering his way through yet another knot of people chattering excitedly about the launch. "I swear on my life I have never been so excited!" One well dress lady was exclaiming, her eyes bright.

Sam had to admit, it _was_ exciting, and his heart filled with awe at the very sight of the massive ship that he would be spending seven days on. He was so distracted looking up at the Titanic that he failed to pay attention to where he was walking.

Sam collides with a golden-haired man dressed in workers clothing. The man stumbles back, almost falling over as he drops the tools he was carrying. They bounce on the cobblestone ground, the loud clattering masked by the loud voices around them.

"I'm so sorry!" Sam exclaims apologetically, crouching down to help the shorter man pick up the tools.

"Don't stress Moose," the golden-haired man winked at Sam, scooping the last of the tools up before thanking Sam quickly and running off to where his co-workers looked to be calling him.

Sam shook his head, straightening back up and grabbing his luggage again. Pursuing his lips, Sam glanced one last time at where the stranger was and decided he was certainly an odd man. But soon enough all thoughts of his weird run-in were soon forgotten, the golden-haired man put to the back of his mind as he got in line to board the Titanic.

Sam grinned widely as the line started moving, his luggage was put onto a cart which would take it to his room ahead of him. The line ambled forward and soon enough Sam was standing at the front, nerves finally touching his heart and making him feel slightly jittery as he glanced back into the crowds one last time before boarding. He couldn't see his brothers, not surprising given just how many people there were, but he did find himself making brief eye contact with the golden-haired stranger from before. Then he was ushered onto the gangplank, and Sam finally set foot on the RMS Titanic.

There were other passengers milling about, some trying to figure out where their rooms were and others were just admiring the ship's insides. Sam felt amazed, he really was here, on his way to back America for the first time in years.

Sam's room was immaculately clean, the walls were creamy white with dark brown trimmings. The floors were covered in a rich coffee coloured carpet that felt plush under his shoes. His trunk was sitting in one corner, and his duffel was resting beside it. All in all, it was a step up from his usual place in second class.

 

~~~

 

10th April 1912

10:00 am

 

Gabriel felt himself being jostled around by the surging crowds. He struggled to keep his grip on the tools in his hands as he tried to follow his older brother Balthazar and their workmates, Victor Henricksen and Andy Gallagher. He could barely believe his luck, he was going to work on _the_ Titanic, it was a fate far better than the other job he had been facing, working in mines.

Noticing the others were slipping further away through the crowds while he had been distracted by his thoughts. Hurrying to keep up, Gabriel suddenly felt himself colliding with another person. The tools in his hands clattered loudly to the ground, and Gabriel dropped to his knees to pick them up.

"I'm so sorry!" The most incredible voice Gabe had ever heard came from the man he'd knocked into.

Gabriel looked up and felt his mouth go dry. Wow, he couldn't even pretend to be normal at that moment, because the man kneeling beside him was way too good looking.

Blinking, Gabriel scrambled to gather his thoughts. "Don't stress moose," Gabriel felt himself winking at the tall man and cursed himself, the last thing he needed was for his actions to leave him without work.

He quickly gathers the last tool and runs off before the tall man could respond.

"What happened to you?" Balthazar asked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously at his younger brother.

Well aware that he was grinning like a schoolgirl who had a crush, Gabriel worked to rearrange his features into a more neutral expression. "I'm fine, this is just an exciting opportunity."

Balthazar nodded, "I know, but you must stay serious, I don't need you acting up and losing your job when I was the one to put you up for it."

Gabriel tried to look as serious as he could as he replied, "of course, I won't let you down."

Balthazar eyed him, then turned to lead him to the gangplank workers were using to move between the jetty and the ship. Gabriel turned to look once last time into the crowd, and he briefly makes eye contact with none other than the tall guy himself. A half smile flashes across his face as he watched the moose like stranger move up the line boarding the ship. Then he felt Balthazar tug his sleeve and Gabriel hurried to follow them onto the ship.

 

Gabriel was already tired, depressed and covered in black coal dust. He hated this, but he needed the pay no matter how bad it was. He sighed, pushing the burning pain of his straining muscles to the back of he head as he continued shovelling coal into the large furnace, the heat was making him sweat, which combined with the dust to form long black lines running down his face. The only good thing about working like this were the hours, they were relatively short shifts with breaks in between. Gabriel was pretty sure that if they had to work any longer than the normal four hours, he'd die from the sheer heat.

"So, what's a youngin' like yourself doing here?" The worker next to him asked Gabe was fairly sure he had said his name was Mick.

"I'm not that young," Gabriel grumbles. "I just look younger than I am."

"How old are you then?"

Gabriel glared at him half-heartedly, the heat making his eyes tear. "25."

"Fine, still young in my eyes but whatever, what'ya doin' down here?" 'Mick' shovelled more coal into a furnace and looked expectantly at Gabriel.

"I'm just earning some money for my family, tryin' to help my little brother Alfie have a chance at going to school."

"School eh? I never bothered with that bullock, but maybe I wouldn't be here if I had."

Gabriel continues to shovel determinedly, "yeah, well I want him to do better than this."

"Ain't nothing wrong with a bit of hope, but with the way the world's going it's getting harder and harder to have it."

"What? Hope?"

"Yeah," Mick frowned at the ever-growing pile of coal. "Y'know there's speak of war going on out there."

Gabriel had heard the whispers, saying that everyone was heading for the biggest war in history. "I did, thought they said it would be years off if it even happened at all."

Mick shrugged and the two fell silent as they continued the repetitive work of shovelling coals. Gabriel found his mind drifting off in an attempt to push off the pain, and he started thinking about the tall stranger again. There had been something about him that he just couldn't forget, maybe it was those hazel eyes that looked like they shifted from hazel to blue to green, or maybe it was his long, chocolate coloured hair that had hung neatly around his face. Or it might of even been his young, innocent face that made him look like he wouldn't be any older than Gabriel. Gabriel secretly hoped he would run into him but he knew that there wasn't much chance of that.

 

Finally, Gabriel was able to knock off, after saying goodbye to Mick, Gabriel planned on going back to his quarters and spending the majority of his eight hours off sleeping. Once he got out of his coal-stained shorts and undershirt that was. Humming to himself, Gabriel stops by the bathroom to wash his face off and was just wiping it dry when he realised something. The ship had launched, they were now not just powering an entire ship with their coal shovelling, but they were also on the ocean, powering their way to the first stop of the trip, in France. Determined to see at least some of the view before nabbing some sleep, Gabriel ran through the narrow corridors until he reached a door that leads to a deck. The sunlight hurt his eyes after spending so much time down in the bowls of the ship, but the view was worth it.

The water was a deep, brilliant blue, sparkling for miles under the sun that shone brightly in the clear sky. Gabe walked up to the edge of the ship in awe, leaning against the side without paying much attention to the rest of the deck. It was only when he felt another person's presence leaning against the side somewhere near him that he actually managed to tear his eyes away from the breath-taking view.

 

It was the tall, handsome guy from before, his ever-changing eyes fixed on the view as the slight breeze stirred his hair. Subconsciously touching his still dusty hair, Gabriel subtly sidled closer to the man.

"Well hey there, I believe we have met before," Gabriel grinned widely.

Tall guy blinked in surprise, turning to face Gabriel, who was praying that the guy wasn't like one of those people in first class that hated workers talking to them.

"Oh, right, are you alright? I didn't mean to run into you, I was just so excited about going on this ship and..." the stranger offered Gabe a shy, cute smile. "I'm uh, I'm Sam Winchester," 'Sam' held his hand out to Gabe.

Gabriel smiled warmly. "Gabriel, Gabriel Novak."

"I'm still sorry, and now I haven't even kept a polite conversational tone, I'm just babbling on..."

"You needn't worry about all that posh talk with me," Gabriel snorts. "I'm just a lowly worker."

Sam flushes, "sorry, I didn't even think about that, is there something against passengers and workers talking?"

Gabriel decided that this Sam character was the most adorable person he had ever met. "No, unless you worry about what others think."

Sam shrugs, "I'm normally second class, or even third class, anyway, this is all new to me." His eyes flash over to the door and back. "And honestly, it is rather boring with all its rules and expectations."

Gabriel laughed, "you know what? You are alright Sam, am I allowed to call you Sam? Or do you prefer Mr Winchester?" Gabriel let a bit of his fake posh accent leak in playfully.

"Sam is fine, Mr Novak," Sam laughed, patting Gabe's shoulder before turning back to the view.

"It's quite a sight, ain't it?" Gabriel murmurs.

"Sure is," Sam sounded more content than he had when they had first started conversing.

Gabriel smiled to himself, hoping he would see more of this Samoose.


	2. Two

10th April 1912

2:30 pm

Sam tried to keep his eyes fixed on the horizon, but they kept on trying to go back to looking at the oddball man next to him. He was intrigued by this Gabriel Novak, the strange yet funny man was refreshing to talk to after the somewhat boring first-class men and woman he'd spent the day conversing with. Despite the weird informalities and odd behaviour, Sam found himself liking Gabriel, he could definitely see himself becoming friends with the shorter man. He glances at Gabriel and saw that he was still looking out across the water, eyes content and not seeming to care that half his body was still covered in coal dust.

Sam, for the first time in his life, started to feel as if his 'sickness' wasn't so bad. Maybe the world was wrong in the way they saw men who liked other men. Because Gabriel was making Sam feel more in their short time of knowing one another than any girl had in his entire life.

 

"So, Sammy, tell me about yourself, because I'm curious about how you came to be a first-class passenger when you're so different, which is a good thing by the way."

Laughing, Sam meets Gabe's eyes, ones that reminded him of sunlight through a glass of whiskey. "Well, my workplace sent me on this trip, apparently I have been chosen to spend a month or two in America to help set up a new office."

Gabriel grinned, "oh, so you're one of those big-shot businessmen, I'm surprised."

Sam finds himself laughing, oh how nice it felt to be able to be himself for once. "Yeah, I don't think so, the title 'lowly assistant to a big shot law firm' might suit me better."

"My, that is a mouthful," Gabriel bursts out laughing.

Sam's brows furrow momentarily, but then he was laughing as well, his eyes crinkling happily. Both men failed to notice how they seemed to subtly move closer to each other.

"So, are you from Britain? Because I could have sworn I heard a distinctly American twang in your accent."

Sam pursed his lips, shaking his head. "Well, my family is actually from America, Kansas in fact, but we moved over to London when I was 15 because our parents died so, so my Uncle, Lord Singer paid for us to be closer to them."

Gabriel looked like he wanted to say something, his mouth opening and closing several times before he decisively snaps it shut and looks up at Sam curiously.  
"So, moose, if you don't mind me asking, how old are you? Because you are rather tall."

"Or maybe you are just really short," Sam grins teasingly, pushing his parent's death to the back of his head as he nudges the shorter man. "But to answer your question, I am 21."

"Wow, I feel so old now," Gabriel laughed. "25 in case you were wondering, and I must say, it has been a pleasure meeting you Mr Winchester."

"Likewise, Mr Novak," Sam couldn't stop grinning, he hadn't felt this relaxed and at peace with another person in years. He closed his eyes, turning his face to face the sea so he could feel the warmth from the last of the sun’s rays. Peace was the only word he could use to describe this moment. He could feel eyes on him however and opened his own to find Gabriel looking pointedly at the water below them, a light blush on his cheeks.

Had Gabriel been watching Sam? If so, then why was he blushing? Inexplicably, Sam felt a blush grow on his own cheeks as he thought about this. For some reason he found himself _hoping_ Gabe had been looking at him. Subconsciously running a hand through his hair, Sam scoured his mind for something else to say as they watched the sun touch the horizon.

"So, do ya have a girl waiting for you back in London?" Gabriel asked, absently running his finger along the smooth wooden railing.

"Uh, no, I'm unattached," Sam could have cursed himself for saying that in such a rush, but for some reason, just like how he'd hoped the shorter boy had been staring, he was always wanting to make sure he knew this.

"Oh, that's cool, surprising but cool," Gabriel coughed. "I'm the same, too busy with work y'know?"

Sam nods, hiding his small smile.

"What about family? You were saying earlier about them, what are your brother's like?" Gabriel seemed hesitant to breach this topic again, maybe he was afraid to bring up Sam's parents.

"Well, Dean is your typical protective, older brother that spends all his time worrying about Adam and I like a mother hen, I love him though because he's always done everything he could to help me, and I haven't always been the easiest little brother to him, but he still tries and for that I'll always be thankful, as for Adam, he's so young and innocent to the harsh reality of the world, Dean and I try our best to protect him but I'm scared it won't be long before something happens and he's forced to grow up too fast."

Gabriel hummed, "you sound like a great older brother, I try to be good to my little brother Samandriel but sometimes I'm scared it’s too late, that he's already seen too much of the real world."

 "He's got a great older brother, I'm sure he'll be just fine," Sam places a hand on Gabriel's shoulder without realising it, smiling at the older boy.

Gabriel just smiled back, and Sam was taken aback by how beautiful the man was as the afternoon sun made his golden hair glow and whiskey eyes gleam brighter. _'God forgive me, but I think I'm going to hell for this man.'_

Gabriel was staring at Sam, unmoving as the two became locked into some sort of staring contest, it was as if the two had stepped into their own personal, invisible bubble.

Of course, this was quickly ruined when the door was flung open and an exhausted looking man stepped out into the fresh air.

"Gabriel!?"

"Oh! Balthy, hey!" Gabriel reluctantly tore his eyes away from Sam to greet his brother.

"Wha- How was work?" Sam couldn't have been certain, but he was pretty sure that this 'Balthy' had an amused look in his eyes as he looked between the two men that were probably standing closer than they should be.

"Great, I only wanted to throw myself in the furnace once every ten minutes," Gabriel snickered.

'Balthy' chuckled and looked at Sam, "Who is your friend?"

"Oh! Right, Balthy this is Sam, Sam Winchester," Gabriel looked up at Sam with a smile. "Sammy, this is my older brother Balthazar."

Sam smiles politely as he shakes Balthazar's hand, "nice to meet you, Mr Novak."

Balthazar laughs warmly, "please, I can't be bothered with all those formalities, just call me Balthazar."

Sam relaxed, he was really liking the Novak's and their friendly personalities.

"Say, Sammy, you should come to the party that's on tonight, it won't be like your usual, first class parties but I reckon you'd enjoy it," Gabriel wriggles his brows at Sam, causing the taller man to laugh.

"I'd love to, when is it?"

"It starts after we’ve set sail again from Cherbourg, I can come by before it starts if you want," Gabriel says.

"I’d love that, I might finally feel less like a fish out of water," Sam tugs on his suit.

"That's the spirit!" Gabriel cheers, slapping Sam's shoulder.

"I'll see you tonight then?" Sam smiles almost shyly.

“Definitely, unless… maybe you want to hang out while the ship’s stopped? I’m not needed to work then because the ship’s not moving so the engines don’t need as many hands and…” Gabriel snaps his mouth shut to stop himself from continuing on with his babbling.

“I’d like that, anything to escape that stiflingly boring atmosphere,” Sam waves a hand towards the general direction of first class.

Balthazar fails to muffle his laughter, “and here I was worried you were another money hogging, suit wearing sheep.”

Sam rolls his eyes humorously when the sound of the door opening again prevented him from replying.

“Samuel! There you are, are these… people annoying you?” A short man dressed smartly stepped out onto the deck with a look of distaste.

“Mr Macleod,” Sam greeted formally, his tone considerably less genuinely warm than it had been minutes before. “I’m, I just needed air and these two gentlemen were simply out here at the same time.”

“Of course, I’m sorry for the disturbance but we were just wondering if you wanted to join us for afternoon tea?”

Sam sighed internally as he nods, “lead the way.”

Mr Macleod smiles smugly at the Novak’s, before turning on his heel and leaving the deck. Sam following close behind, but the taller man paused on the threshold of the door to glance back at the brothers. Smiling apologetically, he looks at Gabriel. “I’ll meet you here around 6’o’clock?”

Gabriel nods, smiling brightly, and with that Sam turned and hurried after his companion.

 

Gabriel was still smiling absently at the door when his older brother nudges him with a small smirk.

"I like him," Balthazar said, almost as if he was implicating something.

"Oh?" Gabriel was still watching the closed door.

"You seemed to get on well too, good on you brother," with that, Balthazar left to get some sleep before the party, and Gabriel stood there for a few minutes longer before following suit.

 


	3. Three

10th April 1912

3:30pm 

Sam managed to stifle yet another yawn as their group left the card game table to finally go and have some afternoon tea. Which sounded like heaven to Sam's ears, had it been with anyone but these monkey suit wearing idiots. 

Although, in saying that, not all of them were all that bad. Sam supposed they couldn't help being raised like this and had no doubt in his mind that given a different upbringing they might actually be cool, interesting friends.

"So, Mr Winchester, how do you know Mr Macleod?" Mr Singer asked. 

Sam was pretty certain he was related with the man through Bobby but couldn't for the life of him remember a Michael Singer from his childhood.

"Oh, well, we work for the same company," Sam clears his throat and takes a small sip of his whiskey that Michael had handed him. He really tries to not think about how the whiskey reminded him of Gabriel's eyes. 

"So, Mr Winchester, have you met my lovely friend Miss Moore?" Bela giggled, leaning against her husband, Crowley, as she introduced her shy looking friend. 

Sam admitted that the blonde haired girl was pretty, but even so all he could think about was escaping that stuffy room to spend the evening with Gabriel.

But he couldn't leave yet, so instead he plasters a polite smile on his face and nods his head to Miss Moore. "Pleasure to meet you."

She smiles widely, "likewise, Mr Winchester."

Mr Macleod smiled at them, a hidden look in his eyes before he starts up a new conversation. 

Sam sighs, zoning out of the conversation as his gaze drifts around the room. He wondered what his parents would think about the first-class part of the titanic. 

His mother would probably sit here playfully making up conversations for the people they would be watching. His father would just scoff and call them pig-headed idiots. 

Feeling a pang of pain and loneliness, Sam rubbed his face tiredly and tried to tune back into the meaningless conversation about land and money. Thankfully one of the servants had refilled his whiskey glass, and Sam took another sip.

"I hear they say there's to be a big war," Mr Tran was saying. "People are saying there's tensions between the countries."

"Pfft, I'm sure it'll all boil down to be nothing," Mr Singer laughed nervously. "I'm more worried about the talk of ice bergs further afield."

Of all the people here, Michael was the one he got along with best. Maybe it was their possible family ties, or maybe the fact that he reminded Sam of Dean. 

Whatever it was, Sam found Michael less... stiff and finally manages to find some interest in speaking. "Ice bergs?"

"Yeah, I heard some servants talking about it, apparently other ships have been warning us." 

"It's nothing," Crowley laughs. "The captain will deal with it, so why worry?"

Bela laughs, "yeah, what's the point in worrying?"

Sam just sighs, he was done with being surrounded by all these selfish, single minded people. He just wanted to be back home with Dean and Adam. But even as he thought this, he realised home wasn't much better. At home he was forced to deal with the constant reminders of his parent's. There he was always remined of the fact that it was his fault that they were dead.

~~Then~~

Sam huddled under the dock, feeling scared as the bullies surrounded him. 

"You're an idiot," one of them laughs, landing a punch in his ribs.

"Am not!" Sam cries, his tounge trips over the words awkwardly and doubling over as another kid punches him in the side. 

"Idiot! You can't even talk properly!" They all laugh, punching and kicking Sam he struggles to stay upright.

"Stop it!"

"Stop it," they all laugh, mimicking his lisp. 

"The freak can't even say one word right," one of the meaner boys, Azazel, laughed cruelly.

Sam tried not to let tears fall as the biggest one kicks his leg, causing Sam to stumble to the ground, he hated his lisp, it always made him sound like an idiot and combined with his freakishly tall growth spurt, he was always picked on.

Their laughter fills his ears as they wail on him. 

"No big brother to hide behind now huh?"

Sam just curls up into a ball, whimpering in pain. Finally, the bullies grow bored and leave him lying in the sand. The air around him grows cold, but he still found himself unable to move. Tears fall down his cheeks until he's all cried out, and then he just lies in the cool sand as the sun sinks below the horizon. 

"Sammy!?" Dean's voice called out through the darkness, and the younger boy raises his bruised face.

"SAMMY?"

"Dean!" Sam calls out, his voice hoarse.

"Sammy!" 

Sam could hear feet running across the sand, and then Dean was kneeling next to him.

"Sam! Who did this?"

Sam shrugs, "doesn't matter, I just wanna go home."

"Okay Sammy," Dean struggles to help Sam up. "But I will find out who did this and hurt them!" Dean says with a determined look in his eyes.

Sam doesn't reply, he just focuses on walking as Dean helps him back up onto the boardwalk. The two start walking for home, Sam leaning against his older brother as they walk down darkened streets. He felt unnerved, scared of something happening.

"Are Mom and dad angry?" Sam asks, chewing nervously on his lip.

"Of course not, they're out looking for you too! But they'll come home soon because they promised."

They had just turned down the street leading to their house when a loud scream tore through the air.

"What do you think that was about?" He asked, feeling even more uneasy as they continued down the street.

"Dunno," Dean lead him towards their still dark house, when they came upon little 2-month-old Adam lying on the sidewalk.

"Adam!" Sam broke away from his older brother to make sure their younger brother was okay. 

"Wait Sammy! Why is he out here?" 

Sam paused, having scooped little Adam up into his arms, looked up at Dean. As he finally caught onto what the older boy was trying to say. Standing up, Sam props Adam on his hip and moves closer to Dean. 

Even at 15 Sam would always fall into that little brother mindset when he felt scared, and Dean would always look out for him. They were family after all, and Sam couldn't ask for a better one. 

"Mom?" Dean calls out into the heavy darkness.

Sam shivered, suddenly it felt as if there was something sinister out there, waiting for them... he just wanted their parents to step out from the house, calling them inside for tea and biscuits. 

But the house stayed dark and silent, the dim street lights further along providing little comfort in the moonless night. 

Sam takes half a step back, and almost falls over as he trips on something lying on the path.

He glances down, mouth turning dry. His mother lay on the ground, blood covering half her face and barely visible in the dark. Beside her, his father lay dead as well. Sam falls to his sore knees, clutching Adam tighter. 

"Mom? Dad?"

Dean was beside him, his breath ragged with emotions. "No, how..."

Sam felt warm tears rush down his cheeks as Adam started crying.

~~Now~~

Sam stood up abruptly, tears filling his eyes. It had been first class teenagers that had bullied him, that had left him until his parents decided to look for him. Then they had died and the bullies continued their relentless teasing of Sam until he had moved to England. 

Now he was surrounded by people that could have been similar to those kids when they were teenagers. He was expected to act snobby, above of everyone else, and as if nothing bad had ever happened to him. 

Ignoring the other's confused questions, Sam turned on his heel and started running. Who was he kidding? Dean probably didn't even want him back, he was just a constant reminder of the accident 7 years ago. Adam was young, but even he could probably see that Sam was the reason he had never known his parents.

Sucking in a deep, ragged breath, Sam burst into his room and tried to calm himself down. But the sobs had started wracking his chest, and even as he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, he kept thinking about how much of a screw up he was. The only thing he had going for him these days was that his lisp was gone.

"God dammit!" Sam sobbed, kicking the small bedside table that had a potted plant on it. The plant fell to the ground, the vase breaking and Sam felt all of his anger and self-loathing that he had been suppressing come to the surface.

Throwing a cushion across the room, he barely noticed the sounds of things falling to the ground. Turning around, Sam caught sight of himself in the mirror and sobbed. He looked pathetic with red-rimmed eyes, tears streaking down his cheeks and his tux rumpled. 

"Its all my fault," he whispered brokenly. Then in a moment of an uncontrollable surge of more anger, he punched the mirror. Glass shattered everywhere, and blood began trickling from his cut-up hand and knuckles, but Sam couldn't care less. 

The room felt stuffy, he needed air. Feeling as if he couldn't breath, Sam ran once more. The corridors blurred by, his lungs were burning and his hand hurt like hell, but Sam didn't care. As soon as he made it onto the deck, Sam sucked in a deep breath, but it wasn't enough to clear his head of the pain and hatred for himself. 

So he ran down the length of the deck, tears falling again as he silently cursed the universe. Between the sobs and running, Sam was gasping for air again, and yet he kept running. Down past where some second class families sat admiring the view. 

Past a couple of workers laughing as they shared a smoke. He kept running until he found himself at the very end of the decking, at the back of the ship. The water below was swirling dangerously in the wake of the ship, promising to pull him down into its icy depths, promising an escape. 

Slamming his hands against the metal railing, Sam let out a cry of anger and pain. He screamed hoarsely up at God, if he was even there, blaming everything on him.

"I just want this pain to end," Sam sobs eventually.

Then, while he wasn't able to think straight through the pain and hatred, Sam climbed over the railing and stood on the edge of the ship.

'One,' he thinks decisively.

'Two,' its not like Adam and Dean would miss him, they probably hated the sight of him, he was just a constant reminder of the night their parents were killed.

'Three.'


	4. Four

10th April 1912  
4:05 pm 

“Wait!” A familiar voice calls out as Sam teeters on the edge. “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like,” Sam snaps, unable to face the speaker as the tears dry against his cheeks.

“Come on Sammy, give me your hand and I’ll pull you back over,” Gabriel was obviously trying to keep his voice calm and steady, but Sam didn’t miss the slight waver.

“No, go away, you don’t even know me,” Sam shuffles on the spot, his gaze on the water below.

“I know that you’re Samuel Winchester, and the only reason you’re here is to help pay for you family’s wellbeing back home, I know you have an older brother called Dean and a little brother who’s only 7 years old, Adam.”

Sam shakes his head, “they’re better off without me.”

“You’re not going to jump,” Gabriel tried reasoning.

“You don’t know that.”

“If you were, you would of already.”

“The only reason I haven’t is because of the fact that you’re talking to me and distracting me!” Sam sasses, tired of arguing. 

“Just give me your hand, remember how you promised to come to the party tonight? I need you to come otherwise I’ll be alone,” Gabriel held out his hand again. “Besides, if you jump in, I’ll just come in after you to save you…. And I don’t know about you but I’m not a big fan of icy water.”

Sam hesitates, what was he doing?

“Please, Sammy…”

Taking a deep breath, Sam shakily reaches out and grabs Gabe’s hand. Then, right as he went to climb over the railing, his foot slipped, and Sam’s heart missed a beat as he started falling. 

His knees bang painfully against the side of the ship, one hand clutching the railing and Gabriel clinging onto the other. The edge was digging into his chest, the cold of the metal soaking through his shirt. 

“I got you Sammy,” Gabriel puffs, struggling to pull Sam up.  
Sam’s feet scramble against the smooth metal side as he pulls himself back up with Gabriel’s help.

Adrenaline pumped through his system as he manages to get one knee back onto the edge. Next thing he knew, Gabriel was hauling him over the rails and Sam knelt on the deck, chest heaving as his emotions ran wild. 

“I’m sorry, oh God what’s wrong with me,” Sam sobs, burying his face in his hands. His bowtie was messy and undone, his tux open and white shirt rumpled. He didn’t look first class, and certainly didn’t feel it. He felt… broken.

“I’m here for you,” Gabriel knelt beside him, hugging him close. “You’re not alone, y’know, I can be your friend on this ship.”  
Sam lets out a wet, strangled laugh. “T-Thank you.”

Minutes passed before they finally moved, Sam embarrassed as he wiped his tears away. By now, the sun was low in the sky, the afternoon rays starting to cast long shadows around them. Gabriel stood up, offering a hand to Sam, who gratefully took it and stood up as well.

“I believe we have a party to get to,” Sam manages a shaky laugh and smile. 

“Well… we have some spare time before it if you want to just hang out.”

“Hang out?”

“Yeah, you know, sit together and talk and stuff,” Gabriel shrugs.

Sam’s mouth quirked up into a smile, a real smile. “Like friends?”

Gabriel laughs, “yeah, is that such a foreign concept to you?”

Sam rolls his eyes in amusement, “no, of course not, I’m just not used to…”

“Real friends? People that aren’t stuck up?” Gabriel wriggles his eyes at the taller boy.

“Oh do shut up,” Sam laughs, nudging him.  
They walked along the shadowy decks, grinning widely as they chattered about everything and anything. 

“Just up here,” Gabriel grabbed Sam’s hand, dragging him behind him as he took off running.  
Sam looked down at their clasped hands with a light blush, then he realised that Gabe was looking back at him, and obviously noticing the blush. 

The only thing stopping him from stuttering out a poor excuse was the soft blush on Gabriel’s face that was accompanying the shy gaze in those whisky coloured eyes. 

“Uh, so this is where I like to come and think,” Gabriel says quietly, his eyes not moving from Sam’s. 

He takes a step back, his hand still entwined with Sam’s for some reason, and ends up leaning against the wall.

Sam took half a step forward, his movements jerky and slow as he finds himself in a daze. The movements simply weren’t his own, and as Gabriel looked up at him, his warm eyes reflecting the sunlight that was also making his hair glow softly. Sam wasn’t entirely sure about what was happening, all he knew was that suddenly Gabriel was reaching up and Sam was leaning down and their lips crashed together in a passionate wave of heat. 

Sam sighs into the kiss, it felt so right, despite how wrong people would say it was, and holding Gabriel in his arms felt… good. 

They pulled back, smiling goofily at each other as they embraced in the hidden corner. Sam ran his fingers through Gabe’s golden hair, and in return Gabriel grips Sam’s suit and smiles against his lips.  
“Aren’t you afraid of your first class friends seeing us?” Gabe smirked.

“Aren’t you afraid of your work friends seeing us?” Sam smirks back, pressing his lips against Gabe’s once more. He felt freer than he had in ages, like a weight had been lifted from his chest and even the fear of someone seeing them couldn’t put a dint in it. 

He felt freer than he had in ages, like a weight had been lifted from his chest and not even the fear of someone seeing them couldn’t put a dint in it.  
Gabe chuckles, leaning against Sam’s taller frame. “Is it bad that I don’t give a damn anymore?”

“Is it bad that I don’t either?” 

Gabe just sighs, closing his eyes and resting the side of his face against Sam’s chest. “It feels like I’ve spent my entire life looking for this exact moment.”

Sam hums in agreement, looking out across the water that glinted under the suns afternoon rays. ‘I’ve found you at last,’ he holds Gabe tighter and the two stood there as time fell away around their small bubble of happiness. 

Of course, their peace was soon interrupted by the sound of Balthazar calling Gabriel’s name from further down the deck.  
“Gabriel! Where the heck are you? You imp! If you’re hiding from me….” 

Gabriel giggled, pressing his face against Sam’s chest to muffle the sound. 

“Gabriel!” Now Balthazar was sounding awfully close, and Sam pulled back from Gabe with a twinge of fear, what if Balthazar saw where they were and got suspicious?

Gabriel must of seen how scared Sam suddenly was because he immediately reaches out and places a calming hand on Sam’s arm.


	5. Five

It's alright, Balthazar is cool with this kinda stuff."

Sam still felt nervous as they left the safety of their small corner, he would rather stay hidden away than go to a party. But even so, he followed Gabriel, they fingers still loosely entwinned, and small smiles on their faces. Warmth filled his chest as he studied Gabriel's face as the last few rays of sunlight caught his features. Sam felt somewhat embarrassed by his sense of awe for this man, but he couldn't help himself, he was already falling hard for the shorter man.

"There you are, bloody hell brother, I've been searching all over for you and looking like an ass as I did, I might add."

Gabriel smirked, holding Sam's hand tighter. "I had better things to do than wait around for you."

Balthazar pursed his lips, looking Sam over. "The hot guy from before, I approve little brother, if there's anyone to risk your reputation and working life over, its him."

Sam flushed, he wasn't used to other guys speaking so casually over what was considered to be one of the greater sins. 

"Don't frighten my moose off Balthy, I actually like his company more than yours, and if you don't mind I believe we have a party to get to," Gabriel sasses.

"I know, I'm here because of that party... honestly Gabe, I wonder how we're brother's sometimes," Balthazar rolled his eyes, grinning as he pats Gabe's shoulder and winked at Sam. 

"Shall we head down then?" Gabriel asked, looking up at Sam with a soft smile.

"Uh, am I dressed alright?" Sam gestured down at his rumpled tux.

Gabriel grinned, running his hands down the front, "you will be the best dressed, believe me."

"Shouldn't I wear something less... first class?"

Gabe shook his head, standing up on the tip of his toes to pull Sam into another kiss. Their lips brushed softly at first, then Gabe wrapped his arms around Sam's neck and smiled against his lips. 

"Of course, we could always skip the party and just hang out, you know, just the two of us."

Sam presses his lips against Gabriel's again, "no, you're the one that suggested this party, so we're going, that's that."

Gabriel sighs loudly, pulling back to brush Sam's hair into place once more. "Fine.... But do you... wanna just sit down and talk afterwards?" 

Sam nods, offering Gabriel a crooked smile. "Okay."

The water was smooth and the sky clear as they headed down the decking, and Sam took a moment to look out across the expansive ocean, just taking in the impressive view, before he followed Gabriel and Balthazar through the door leading down to the steerage quarters.

5:45 pm

Sam smiled widely as they entered the large room full of people dancing, laughing and drinking. It was a fair sight different to the boring First class parties Sam usually attended. Here, instead of standing around in stiff tux's and fancy dresses while talking about dreadfully boring topics, people were smiling and stood in relaxed clusters or danced happily. 

Sam felt Gabriel bump his arm, a wide smile on his face as well. 

"So, do you want to grab a drink and dance?" Gabriel asked, extending a hand to the drinks table. 

Sam nods, letting Gabriel lead him over to the drinks table. The room was so full, they were instantly engulfed by the crowd, being jostled by cheerful dancers. Gabriel's fingers brushed his and Sam unconsciously turned over his hand so their fingers could entwine. Gabriel held his hand tight after this, their hands unseen as they made their way through the last gaggle of people, eventually breaking free and ending up in a quiet corner by the drinks. 

Sam was reluctant to let go of Gabe's hand, but they could not risk anyone seeing them. So he lets their hands fall apart, meeting Gabriel's eyes with a crooked smile. Sam happily accepts a glass of whiskey, looking out over the happy crowd as he sips away at his drink. 

He didn't want to dance if it wasn't with Gabe, so he tuned into the conversation Gabe was having with two other guys. 

"And this is a new friend of mine, Samuel Winchester," Gabriel waved his hand at Sam, who smiles politely in reply.

"Samuel, I haven't seen you around before."

"Ah, that's because-"

"Sam's First Class, but he hates it up there."

The two laugh loudly, "I don't blame you Samuel, it's good to see you have a working pair of eyes and no stick up your ass."

Sam smiles back slowly, nervous but happy that they seemed to accept him. So he happily settled into the conversation, leaning with his back against the wall. The night passed fast, Sam got along with Gabriel's friends well, especially William Harvelle who had a little girl, Jo, that hung around his legs dancing and giggling.

"You're tall," she giggles shyly up to Sam. "Can you dance with me? Daddy is tired."

Sam hesitated, looking up at William who laughed and nodded his consent. "Please, I need a drink."

So Sam grinned at the little girl and helped her onto his feet, holding her small hands carefully. They danced around the room, Jo laughing happily and Sam smiling as he felt at peace. He glanced up and caught Gabriel's eye as the shorter man stood staring at them with a small smile. Sam blushed and looks away, focusing instead on dancing back around the room with Jo, so they ended back at the group. 

Jo giggled, running over to her father and hugging him until he picked her up. Sam watched them with a smile, aware of Gabriel's presence at his shoulder as William announces that he needed to go and put Jo to bed.

Jo was resting her head sleepily on his shoulder, but she managed to wave to Sam. "Bye!"

Sam chuckles, "goodbye Jo."

The Harvelle's leave the busy room, and Gabriel nudges Sam discretely. "Shall we go?"

Sam nods, turning and following Gabriel out of the room and along the corridors to the deck. Finally, they emerged out under the star-lit sky, the titanic was sailing over calm water, giving them a perfect night. Sam walked to the railing and leaned against it, smiling up at the night sky as Gabriel did the same next to him. 

"You know, my brother and I sometimes hike out at night, up a small hill near our house, and sit on the top for hours at night, just looking at the stars," Sam murmurs, absently shuffling closer to Gabriel, so their shoulders were pressed together.

"It sound's like you and Dean are really close," Gabriel says, leaning slightly against Sam.

"Yeah, I suppose we are."

"You wanna do something crazy?" Gabriel says suddenly, a mischievous look in his eyes. 

"What is it?" Sam asks hesitantly. 

"Follow me," Gabriel grabs Sam's hand and begins dragging him down the deck.

Sam shook his head and chuckles silently as he runs along, the cold air even colder against his burning cheeks. They run right down the deck, and as they were the only ones out by the time they reached the end, Sam pulled Gabe back and leans against the rail. He kisses Gabriel softly, smiling against his candy tasting lips. 

"What was that for?" Gabriel asks, smiling brightly.

"Because I can," Sam presses his forehead against Gabe's.

"Well, I'm certainly not complaining," Gabriel smirked. "So feel free to do that whenever you want."

After kissing once more, Gabriel turns and leads Sam to the very front of the ship, climbing up onto the small rise on their side of the railing. Sam follows with a confused expression.


	6. Six

Gabriel leaned against the railing, smiling out at the ocean with a peaceful smile on his face. Sam clambered up next to him, even in the dim lighting he was still wary however, wary of someone seeing them. 

After a while, Gabe broke the peaceful silence. 

"Do, do you ever wonder if maybe there's something wrong wi-with people like us? Seeing how it's so frowned upon."

Sam shrugged, eyes fixed on the water below. "I think that people will always have their own opinions and that when a majority of people have the same one, everyone else will decide that it must just be the way life should be."

Gabriel sighed, strangely solemn, "so, we ar-aren't sick?"

Sam shrugged, "maybe we are, maybe we aren't, but I'm sick to death of always thinking of it as a bad thing, I mean, love is love, isn't it? I think people should be allowed to love who they want regardless of gender."

Gabriel smiled, leaning closer to Sam, "that rant was adorable."

Sam blushes, "do shut up."

"Make me." 

~~~~~~

April 12th

5pm

Sam lay sprawled out on his bed, reading a book. Gabriel, having just finished a shift, was dozing next to him.

"Hey, Sammy?"

"Mmm?" Sam absently replies, turning the page of his book.

"What are you gonna do in America? I mean, I know that you said you were helping set up a branch for your firm, but after that?"

Sam hummed thoughtfully, putting down his book and rolling onto his side to face Gabriel.

"Well, I guess I'll be going home to England, to my brothers."

"Ah, okay."

"Why do you ask?"

Gabe shrugged, "I don't know, I guess I was curious."

"What about you?"

Gabriel frowned thoughtfully, "I honestly have no clue, I guess I find more work on other ships so I can keep sending money back to my family."

Sam smiled softly, "you're a good brother."

Gabriel was silent for a moment, looking down at the sheets with a troubled expression. 

"Hey, are you okay?"

Gabriel shrugged, "I don't know, I mean, I just thought that... I mean, I hoped that maybe we wouldn't have to part ways."

Sam bit his lip, knowing exactly how Gabe felt. "Same, I had this delusional hope that perhaps... just maybe... we could but then I see how the world views are and, I don't know, I guess I just realize that what we want isn't always what we can have."

Gabriel nodded slowly. "How come you're so wise, and yet younger than me?"

"Shut up, idjit." Sam laughs, pulling Gabriel into a hug. "I'm not wise, I just have strong opinions on the world's views."

Gabriel snuggled into Sam and the two of them just lay there, content in the warmth of each other. They knew that once they reached New York they would be forced back into the harsh real world. But for now, everything was okay. 

"You know what would be nice?" Gabe's voice was soft.

"What?"

"Well, should I get work on a ship going back to England... maybe I could help you and your brother's return to America." Gabriel tightened his arms around Sam. "And maybe we can get a nice little country home in the middle of nowhere... just the two of us."

Sam closed his eyes, smiling at the dream scenario. "Would we have a dog?"

"Definitely, and we would grow our own food so we wouldn't have to go into town all the time and face judgment...."

"We could be happy," Sam murmurs.

Gabriel hums happily. "I want that."

"So why don't we do it?"

Gabriel looked at Sam in surprise. "Wait, seriously? How?"

Sam shrugged. "We'd make it work, I don't know about you but I would fight for us and our dream."

"I would too," Gabe intertwines their hands, shifting out of the hug in order to kiss Sam softly. "I know we haven't known one another long... but I care deeply for you Samuel Winchester."

"I care deeply for you too, Gabriel Novak."

Gabriel snuggles back into Sam, a smile on his face. He couldn't wait to make their dream a reality. Already he could see them in their house, happy and together. With their dog, of course. 

*-*-*-*-*-*-*

April 13th  
10 pm

Sam wrapped his coat around himself as they stepped out into the cold night air. Gabriel was jiggling next to him. They held hands, feeling safe under the cover of darkness. 

Sam wondered what his brother would think if he knew of Sam's feelings for another man. Would he be disgusted? Or supportive? Sam couldn't stand the thought of disappointing his older brother, but he couldn't deny his feelings either. Not when they made him this happy. 

"Hey Sam, where are we going?"   
Sam shook himself out of his thoughts, his smiles at Gabriel. "You'll see."

Honestly, he was excited to show Gabe what he had set up with the help of the Novak's older brother. Balthazar had been overly eager to help in fact. Sam thought that his attitude towards such things was a refreshing welcome after spending each day among the stuck up, snobby first class passengers. He really didn't understand the whole deal about being first class. It was intolerable most of the time and the only people he actually liked was Kevin Tran and Michael Singer. They at least had some personality and respect for others. 

With Gabriel, Sam felt like he was free from the suffocating social expectations. Gabriel helped him feel free, happy. So that's why he wanted to do something to show the other man how grateful he was. 

Turning around the corner, Sam leads Gabriel to a dark corner on the front deck, hidden safely behind a lifeboat. There, he had a picnic laid out. A couple of candles lit up the scene, and a bottle of wine sat waiting for them. Sam made a mental note to thank Balthazar later. 

Gabriel was smiling widely, eyes glancing around the scene. 

"Like it?"

Gabriel responded by turning around and bringing Sam into a soft kiss. "I love it, thank you, Samuel."

Sam blushes, smiling happily as they sat on the blanket. He opened the bottle of wine and poured them each a glass while Gabriel looked through the food. 

They enjoy the picnic, content with one another's company and being able to be close freely without fear of someone seeing them. 

"Hey, Gabriel?

"Yeah?"

"Would you like to come to lunch with me tomorrow?"

Gabriel sat up. "Like, in first class? Lunch in first class?"

Sam chuckled, pouring himself some more wine. "Yes, first-class lunch."

"Wow." Gabriel chucked a grape into his mouth. "And what will your stuck up friends think of me?"

"I don't care," Sam huffed. "They're not exactly what I would call friends." It was true, he could barely stand talking to most of them.

"Well then, Mr Winchester, I would love to accompany you to lunch tomorrow."

Sam grins. "And I look forward to seeing you there, Mr Novak."

They burst out laughing, and it felt freeing. They were just being themselves and nothing else. 

\-------

April 14th  
12:30 pm

Sam walked into the first class dining room with Gabriel, feeling only the slightest hint of nerves as he smiled at his... friend.

"Wow," Gabriel breathed out, looking up at the detailed ceiling. "This place is beautiful."

"Well, it is now you're here," Sam said this a barely a whisper, but Gabriel still heard him and shot Sam a small smirk. 

"Sammy, that was so mushy."

Sam blushed faintly. "I know, it's part of my charm."

Gabriel grinned. "Cute."

"I am not cute!"

"Are too."

Sam rolls his eyes, but doesn't say anything more on the matter as they reached the table. 

"Mr Winchester, how do you do?" Mr Singer smiled warmly. 

"I'm excellent, Mr Singer, may I introduce a good friend of mine, Gabriel Novak." Sam smiled discretely at the confused expressions on his acquaintances. "Gabriel, this is Mr Singer, Mr Macleod, Mr Tran, Mrs Macleod and Miss Moore." He points to each one in turn and they all murmur polite greetings. 

"So, Mr Novak, where are you from?" 

Sam sat next to Gabe, his eye on Crowley and Gabriel replied to his question.

"Oh, I am originally from America, but my family has done some... traveling over the years."

"That's interesting, I myself hail from Scotland, but I do find the idea of America so oddly interesting." Crowley brushed imaginary lint from his jacket. "Is it true that New York has the most lively entertainment at night?"

Gabriel shrugged. "I wouldn't know, I hail from Arkansas."

"Where?"

"Exactly." Gabriel doesn't elaborate, instead just smirking at the confused looking Crowley.

Sam stifled his chuckles, faking a cough instead. Jessica looked at him suspiciously. 

Lunch passed painfully slow after that, the group making small talk throughout the meal. Sam suddenly wanted to be in his room with Gabriel rather than having to be here. But in this world of harsh societies, appearances mattered and that meant Sam couldn't always be off with Gabriel.

Next, they had to sit through another painful hour as the men gathered in another room to play cards and drink whiskey. Sam was at his wits end before long, long since done with putting up with Crowley's awful chit chatting.

"Okay, well Gabriel should really get going now, he has this... thing he promised to do this afternoon and I uh, I said I'd go along and support him." Sam wasn't the smoothest liar.

"Oh, of course, we'll see you later."

They hurry out after a quick goodbye, breathing in relief as they make it onto the deck.

"Oh my goodness, you weren't kidding when you said it was painful." Gabriel laughed.

Sam shook his head. "It is the most horrible thing to have to suffer through."

Gabriel hums in agreement, looking Sam over with a suggestive smirk.

"What?"

"Well... we have the entire evening to ourselves now..."

Sam grins, and the two head back to the room.

(Whether they did the frick frack or not, its up to you but I really can't go through that awkwardness right now...)


	7. Seven

April 14th  
5:00 PM

Sam ran a hand through Gabe's hair, a feeling of content warming his chest. This was the true heaven, lazily lying about with the man he was falling hopelessly in love with.

Gabriel had his head resting on Sam's stomach as he stared up at the ceiling of Sam's cabin. This had quickly become something that they did a lot. Sam most decidedly enjoyed it, he loved the feeling of Gabriel's hair running through his fingers. 

Not for the first time, Sam's thoughts return to their pondering over what would happen to them next. When they reached New York. When they had to return to the reality of their society. 

They could be happy, Sam knew they could. But would they be able to live their lives with such a secret? Would they grow tired of having to constantly be hiding their true feelings? Sam hoped so, he would do anything to be with Gabriel. And yet, despite this, Sam found himself facing a niggle of doubt in his stomach. 

Still, he could worry about this later. For now, he wanted to just enjoy the moment before anything could rip this away from him. 

Gabriel shifts, opening his eyes and smiling at Sam.

"Hey, Sammy?"

"Hmm?"

"We should go up onto the main deck tonight, stargaze for a while."

"Since when were you the romantic one?" Sam grins.

Gabriel rolls his eyes. "Shut up."

"Make me," Sam teases.

"I would..." Gabriel raised a suggestive eyebrow at him. "But that would require me to move and I'm too tired to."

"Your loss..." 

Gabriel huffs. "Mean."

"I know." 

Gabriel makes another noise of annoyance, but leans up and softly kisses Sam. 

"Now shut up so we can nap together."

Sam chuckles, "you're lucky I like you."

"I love you too, now sleep."

April 14th  
11:30 pm

Sam wasn't sure what it was that had woken him up. The room was dark and quiet, it was a calm night. Yet the hairs on the back of his neck and along his arms were rising in unease. 

Then it struck him. The lighting above his bed was swaying ever so slightly. He could vaguely remember feeling what had seemed like an Earthquake, now almost lost in that thin veil between sleep and wakefulness.

"Gabe?"

Gabriel was still fast asleep, snoring ever so softly as he cuddled against Sam's side.

Another thing occurred to Sam at that moment, sending chills down his spine. It was too quiet. The usual background hum of the propellers was missing, instead replaced by the stillness of the night. 

"Gabriel?"

Gabriel stirs, murmuring sleepily under his breath.

"Gabe, I think something is wrong with the ship."

"Whaddya mean?" Gabriel's voice was so thick with sleep that it took Sam a moment to understand what he said. 

"I think we've stopped moving."

This got his attention. "What?" He sat up, rubbing the last of the sleep from his eyes. 

"Listen."

They both fall silent, and the silence grew more profound. 

"That's not right."

"Really? Here I was thinking that this was normal." Sam sassed back.

"Shush." Gabriel was out of bed in seconds, pulling on his worker's overalls. "Let's check it out, Mr Sarcasm."

Sam rolls his eyes, grabbing his own casual clothes on and following Gabriel out of the cabin. Heads were sticking out some of the other cabins, passengers who had noticed the strange silence asking passing servants in hushed, worried voices.

Gabriel leads Sam down past all this, turning down a smaller passage that leads to the narrow servant stairs. 

They jog down as fast as they could. Sam having to take it slightly slower than Gabe as his long legs kept causing him to slip and almost tumble head first. 

Finally, they came out into the bowls of the ship. The boiler room that Gabriel worked in. People here were yelling, men running around while others shovelled coal into the boilers haphazardly. It was swelteringly hot in here, Sam felt sweat already starting trickle down the sides of his face. Gabriel pulled him through the yelling mass of workers until they reached someone he recognized. 

"Balthy, what in God's name is going on?"

Balthazar looked exhausted, his face somehow both pale and red at the same time. "We hit an iceberg not too long ago, they said we didn't take too much damage but..."

"But you think they're lying."

"Exactly, we wouldn't be panicking this much if it wasn't bad."

"Do you know how bad it is?"

"I can't be sure... but I think we're taking water on-board in some sections."

Sam felt his stomach twist with nerves. That wasn't something you want to hear when you were in the middle of the ocean. 

"Do you need me?" Gabriel asked with wide eyes. 

"No!" Balthazar's voice instantly grew hard. "If you start now, they'll keep you on until the end, they don't care about the workers, they only want us to keep down here so the passengers might have power on while they die."

Sam licked his lips. "You think we're going to sink?"

Balthazar nods. "I would say so, which is why you can't work tonight brother." Balthazar took a breath as if to steady himself. "One of us need to get home to our family."

"Balthy, please tell me you don't intend on staying onboard." Gabriel looked so broken at that moment.

"Sorry, Gabey." 

Before Gabriel could say anything more, Balthazar was being called over by someone and then he was gone. 

"Come on Gabe, we should go."

Gabriel hesitated for a moment, looking stricken. 

"Gabriel."

Gabriel nods slowly, the orange light of the coal fires glittered off the tears that had gathered in his eyes. "Yeah, let's go."

\--------

April 15th  
Sometime after 12 am (That's right, the end is near...)

They ran back up the stairs together, determined to find out just how bad this was.

Sam just hoped that he had misread just how terrified Balthazar had looked.

"Can everyone please just dress warmly, don your life jackets and make your way towards the lifeboats in a calm and orderly fashion."

Servants walked along, handing out life jackets while one man was at the end of the corridor, calling out his instructions over and over as he briskly walked along.

"It really is bad, they're evacuating the ship," Sam feels a ball of fear take root in his stomach.

"But-"

The ship chose that moment to jolt violently, hideous creaks of metal giving way came from down below.

Sam automatically reached out to grab Gabe's hand. His heart was thumping loudly in his ears.

The sound that came next went icy chills of fear down his spine.

The sound of water, almost too distant to hear, but still there.

Everyone began to speed up, hastily climbing the stairs. Although some, much to Sam's surprise, went to the lock-up where they had been safekeeping everyone's jewels and items of value.

People were pushing past with barely a second glance to be had at their clasped hands  
"I can't do this," Gabriel was looking around with wide eyes.

"Do what?"

"Balthy, he will die if we leave him here... I- I can't leave him to die, Sammy, that's my brother."

"That's right, women and children first!" The man was now trying to direct everyone up the stairs to the deck. "I said women and children first you daft old man!"

Sam clutched Gabriel's hand tighter, they were being swept along closer and closer to the safety of the lifeboats. And yet... Sam knew he would go back if it was his brother, and they wouldn't be allowed on the lifeboats yet anyway.

He turned to Gabriel, about to suggest that they should indeed go back when a final surge in the crowd sent them stumbling and tripping onto the stairs.

"Don't let go of me," Gabriel said.

Unable to turn back, they were forced to march up onto the deck in an 'orderly manner'.

There, it was chaos. Panicking people were heading for the lifeboats, musicians were surprisingly playing through the madness and workers tried and failed to get the crowd to settle. 

Gabriel was fighting against the flow, shouting in a raw voice even as it grew obvious that he would not be going back down the stairs.

"Gabriel! Hey, Gabe, looked at me. Look at me!" Sam pulled Gabe back, shaking him in order to draw his attention back to Sam. "You need to calm down, we'll find another way back down."

"Stand back! The first lifeboat is going down!"

Sam looks over, in time to see a half-filled lifeboat being lowered. "Hey! That's not full!" He yells this in fury, also noting at the same time that so far only the first time passengers had made it up onto the deck. "What in Gods name do you think you're doing! You can fit so many more people onto that! Why aren't you loading the second and third class women and children?"

The worker just looks him over, raising an eyebrow at Sam. "Sir, please calm down and stay back."

Sam opened his mouth to fire back an angered response, then he realized that the hand that he had been holding was now gone. Gabriel was no longer next to him.

"Gabriel!?" Sam looked back over the crowd, but Gabe's golden hair was nowhere to be seen. "GABRIEL?" Sam grew panicked

He started pushing back through the crowds, eyes peeled for the short man but there was no sign of him.

Where on earth had he gone?

The boiler room. Of course, that idiot had gone back alone for his brother. Sam curses Gabriel under his breath, before changing course and pushing through the milling crowds, heading for the servant's stairs. 

He shoves the door open, taking the stairs two at a time as he runs down. Several times he has to catch himself on the railing, almost falling head first in his hurry. 

"Gabriel?" Sam soon reaches the bottom and is faced with rapidly rising water. "Gabriel! Where the hell are you?"

There was no reply, but Sam could hear muffled yelling coming from further along. Taking a deep breath to settle his nerves, Sam starts running in that direction. Water sloshed against his ankles, seeping fast into his shoes and pant legs. He doesn't care, all that matter was finding Gabe.

"Gabe!?"

"Sam?" 

This time Sam heard a faint reply, and immediately sped up in the direction of Gabriel's voice.

"Sammy!?" Gabriel sounded closer now.

The water now reached Sam's calf, slowing him down from an all-out sprint to an awkward sloshing jog. 

Sam rounded another tight corner, and to his relief, Gabriel was only meters away. 

"Sam!" Gabriel grinned. He was holding up a dishevelled looking Balthazar. "Help me!"

Sam splashed forward the last few meters, grabbing Balthazar's other side and helping Gabriel drag him through the freezing water. 

"What the hell happened?"

"I have no clue." Gabriel was puffing slightly. "I found him slumped against the wall, his leg looks broken."

Sam decides not to ask Balthazar what had happened just yet. Instead, he looked over at Gabriel.

"What the hell happened to you, Gabe? One minute you were with me, and the next thing I know, I've lost you."

"Yeah, I... I know," Gabriel pauses to breath. "You can reprimand me on that later."

Sam huffs, but now really wasn't the time to argue. The water had now risen to mid-thigh height. Sam shivers glad to see the stairs just ahead. 

However, when they got to the stairs, Sam realized that they must have gone the wrong way.

"Wait, these aren't the servant stairs," Sam could feel the water start to soak into the hem of his jacket. 

"These led to the second class, so hopefully we can find our way from there," Gabriel starts to lead them up the thankfully dry stairs.

Balthazar appeared to be in a great deal of pain. His pant leg was covered in blood and what appeared to be soot.

"Gabe, things aren't too good, are they?"

Gabriel pursed his lips, silent for a moment but his eyes said it all. "I'm sure we'll be fine."

Sam nods, not buying at a word of it. 

They make it up to the third class floor and are instantly met with pure chaos. The stairwell that continued up was shut off, caged doors shut across it and an officer standing on the other side, shouting at the screaming crowd.

Sam followed the breathless Gabe in setting Balthazar down against the wall. Then the two of them join the crowd. 

Gabriel silently grabs Sam's hand, what did it matter now anyway? And Sam gave his lover a small smile. If this truly was the end, at least they would be together.


	8. Eight

Sam and Gabe quickly find a familiar face. It was Mr Harvelle, his daughter Jo was resting on his hips.

"Bill! What's going on here?" Gabriel steps forward, waving a hand at the closed gate. 

Bill looked paler than Sam remembered him being last time they had met. "They won't let us through until the first class passengers have boarded the lifeboats."

Sam felt a flash of anger. "They what??"

Bill shrugs. "That's what the man up there said." He sounded bitter, bouncing a scared looking Jo up and down a few times. He looked down at her and then back to them. Then, lowering his voice, "look, boys, I'll be honest with you, I don't care about myself so much, but I can't let my little Jo die on this tin can."

Sam looked up at the officer, eyes narrowed. "They can't do that, its inhumane!"

Gabriel nods in agreement, his hand tightening around Sam's. "We have to get up to those lifeboats."

The ship lurches. The lights flickering for just a moment before returning to normal. Sam glances back towards the stairs they had come up. It wouldn't be long before the water reached them.

Sure enough, the water had already reached the top of the stairs, spilling out onto the floor of the corridor. 

"Sam," Gabriel, seeing this, had stepped closer to him.

"Excuse me!" Sam stepped towards the officer. "Why have you shut these people down here?"

"Just acting on orders, sir." The officer stepped towards the gates, "now why don't you just wait patiently and soon enough you'll be allowed through."

Sam huffs at this, they would drown before being let through at this rate. "Are you kidding me!? There are women and children down here that need to get on those lifeboats!"

By now, the water had reached ankle height and was rising steadily. 

"Sir, I don't want to have to tell you again, step. Back."

Sam narrows his eyes, ignoring the pounding of his heart as he does just the opposite and steps forward. "No."

The officer stands right next to the gate now. "I'm telling ya, back off before I lock you up!"

Sam reacts fast, reaching out and grabbing the officer. He pulls the officer against the bars, holding him there even as he squirmed. "And I said, no. Let these people through first."

The officer was gasping for breath, and while Sam had him pinned to the gate, Gabriel was able to slip his keys off his belt. Sam kept a hold of the guy while Gabe opened the gates. Then chaos ensued. 

People were pushing and shoving to get past, to escape the rising water. Sam and Gabriel go to grab Balthazar when a pair of arms wrap around Sam's neck. The taller man, thrown off guard, falls to his knees and struggles to breathe. 

"You're in a lot of trouble."

"Sam!" Gabriel had glanced back when he realized that Sam wasn't there to help with Balthazar. 

"Get off him!" It was Bill, his arms wrapped around Jo. 

Sam clawed at the surprisingly strong arms, almost able to pry them off. Then there was a metallic click and everyone froze.

"Now now, none of this nonsense." It was another officer, his strangely yellow eyes glinting dangerously. "I'm sure we can work this all out."

Sam swallows thickly. All he can see is the gun barrel being held against a pale Gabriel's head. 

"Unless, of course, you want your boyfriend here to die."

~~~~~~~~

Sam walked through the flooded corridor, each footstep seeming to meet a deeper level of water than the last. 

The officer, Azazel, followed close behind with the handgun jabbed in between Sam's shoulder blades. No matter where Sam looked, he couldn't see a way out of this. 

Gabriel had, thankfully, been allowed to stay behind and help Balthazar and Bill get up to the decks. They weren't what Azazel had wanted. Sam was.

"Get in there," Azazel jabs the gun into his shoulder, turning Sam so he faced a small room. "You and I have to have a little chat..."

Sam was sure that the last thing Azazel wanted was to chat.

He had barely entered the room when the first punch landed on his jaw. Followed by several more as the taller man staggers under the blows. 

"I should have known that you were trouble the moment your faggot ass first boarded this boat."

Sam gasps as Azazel punches him in the stomach, sending him crashing breathlessly onto his knees. 

"Stop... please..."

"Of course, then you and that asshole Novak start sneaking around with your disgusting acts and I just knew it would only be a matter of time before you did something."

Sam hisses in pain. "What did I do to you?"

Azazel doesn't respond, instead, he just kicks Sam hard and held the gun against his head. "Now I'm going to do something that I should have done years ago," he hits Sam's head with the butt of the gun. "Now, I'm gonna finish what I started that night when I killed your parents."

Sam's mind scrambles to gather his thoughts, to make sense of Azazel's words. He could taste blood in his mouth and feels water seeping into his jacket sleeves as he uses his arms to keep his head out of the rising water.

"Wait... you-"

Azazel kicks Sam in the stomach, and all the air left Sam's lungs as he collapsed. His head is briefly submerged under the water. Then Azazel grabbed him by his hair and lifts him out. 

"Now, I'm going to leave you here and enjoy the thought of you slowly drowning while I get on one of those lifeboats... then I will have to very somberly visit your brothers and tell them of your tragic end."

Sam shakes his head. "No-"

"Hope you like to go swimming." Azazel drags Sam over to the side of the room and produces a pair of officer's cuffs. He proceeds to cuff both Sam's wrists with the chain looped around a metal pipe. 

Sam spat out a mouthful of blood, trying to get more air into his lungs. "Help-" his voice barely rises above a whisper. 

Azazel just laughs cruelly, winking before walking out of the room and whistling cheerfully. 

Sam takes a moment to try and gather his scattered thoughts. His entire body hurt, and ice cold water now lapped around his stomach. Pulling on the handcuffs, Sam quickly determined one thing. He was utterly and entirely screwed.

The water around him had turned red with blood, and the idle thought of sharks outside waiting to grab him crossed his dazed mind. His thoughts then returned to skipping over what Azazel said. He was going to kill Sam's brothers and Sam couldn't warn them. 

It was long before he ceased pulling at the chain. There was nothing he could do now but wait. His body, battered and cold, couldn't keep at it any longer. 

His eyes drift shut, he was exhausted. Done. 

"Sammy!?"

No, Sam thought. Leave me alone to sleep.

"Sammy! This isn't funny, answer me!"

Sam just sighs, why couldn't this yelling voice let him rest?

"Sam!?" The voice was closer.

"Go 'way." Sam murmurs, unable to open his eyes. He could feel water against his chest now. He just couldn't bring himself to care.

"Sam!" The sound of someone sloshing through the water follows this. "Oh my god, what happened to you?"

Sam blearily looks at the blurry figure in front of him. 

"Hang on Sam, I'll get you out of here."


	9. Nine

April 15th  
1:30 am

Sam forces his eyes to stay open. It wasn't easy given that his eyelids seemed to suddenly weigh a ton, and his mind was nothing more than a fuzzy mess of confused thoughts and pain. 

"Hang on Sammy, I'll get you out of this." 

Sam blinks, slowly. Was that... Gabriel? He shakes his head, Gabriel needed to leave. He tried saying as much, but his mouth didn't seem to want to work.

There was the sound of water sloshing as Gabriel moved around. "Hang on Sammy, I'll be right back."

The sound of water splashing faded with Gabriel leaving the room, and Sam slowly became aware of just how much pain he was. His mind had started to clear, thoughts getting back into order. He also came to realize that the cold water wasn't exactly getting warmer, but he was just growing numb. 

Sitting up straighter, Sam looks around in panic. The water was at his collarbone now, it was only a matter of time before he was drowning in it. He didn't want to die, not like that at least. He had to escape, warn his brothers before it was too late.

"Sam! I found a spare set of keys so hopefully one of these work." Gabriel sloshed back into the room.

"Gabe-" Sam winced as the pain in his head reared back up. 

"It's all good Sammy, I'll get you out of it."

Sam took a steadying breath as the panic began to set in, the water now at his throat. 

Gabriel hurried to him, fumbling with the keys as he did so. The first one didn't work, nor did the second, or third.

"Dammit," Gabriel curses under his breath. "How are there so many goddamn keys?"

Sam felt unable to breathe. The water was basically at his chin now.

Gabriel tried another three keys, almost dropping the keys in his panic. 

Sam could taste the salty water as it laps against his bottom lip.

Gabriel tried another two. Sam took a final breath of air as the water got too deep, he couldn't physically keep his head out of it any longer.

The salt water stung his eyes as he held them open, he could feel his hair floating around his head like a jellyfish. He could only just hear Gabriel's muffled voice, feel him pulling at Sam's arms. 

Then, to Sam's shock, his arms were free of the tight cuffs. Feeling quickly returns to his fingers as he pulls them back into a natural position. Then he was being pulled up and stood free of the water's surface. 

He coughs, dragging in air as Gabriel worriedly asked how he was. He didn't dare try to move yet, his legs hurt from the beating. 

"Sam? Are you okay?" Gabriel shook Sam's arm slightly.

"Think so," Sam rubs the back of his head, wincing. 

"What the hell happened?" 

"Azazel, he was the psycho that killed my parents."

"Oh shit," Gabriel paled. "He's taking Balthazar upstairs for me, he offered to after he came back..."

Sam shook his head to clear it, "we need to go."

The water was too deep to easily move through, and Sam found it even harder due to his injuries. The water was rising higher, a constant reminder that their time was numbered unless they somehow got onto a lifeboat. 

Sam didn't care, as long as he stopped Azazel from escaping then that was all that matters. His brothers couldn't die, heck Adam was only 5 he had barely experienced the world. 

They had finally reached the stairs, Gabriel leading the way and Sam hobbling along behind. The first corridor they reached was eerily quiet, devoid of any life. 

Gabriel pulled Sam up another set of stairs, the same servant stairs that Sam had followed Gabe down not so long ago. He doubted that anything more than an hour or two had passed since then and yet it felt like a lifetime ago. Their cuddling in his cabin felt like it had happened in whole other life. 

Sam kept his eyes peeled as they finally emerged back onto the chaotic decks. People rushed back and forth, women and children were being loaded onto lifeboats. 

"Where are they?" Gabriel cranes his neck, unable to see over the crowd due to his lack of height. 

Sam opens his mouth, about to say that he couldn't be sure, when suddenly he caught sight of Balthazar being thrown onto a lifeboat. He took off, Gabriel close behind. They dart through the crowd, Sam pushing people out of the way without a second thought. 

A man was climbing on board behind Balthazar, much to the crowds obvious dismay, and Sam instantly recognized him as Azazel.

"Hey!" Sam pushes through the last few people, anger fueling his movements. "Don't lower that raft!"

The operator pauses, surprised. "Sir-"

"You!" Sam glared at Azazel. 

"Me, although I am rather surprised to see that you are still among the living."

Gabriel reaches Sam's side, puffing slightly. "Why.... why did you take my brother?"

"I have my reasons," Azazel smirks. "I see you found your boyfriend... such a shame."

Sam doesn't have the time for this, and he grabs Azazel by the jacket before the man has a chance to reach for his gun. 

"I'm not letting you kill my brothers."

Azazel smirks. "Oh my dear Sammy, that's where you're wrong, see when I do get out of this, and trust me I will, your dearest brothers will die a slow and painful death after hearing the tragic news of your death."

"You're not leaving this boat."

"Please, you're no killer." Azazel seems confident in this.

"And what makes you say that?"

Azazel looks behind him. "I have a feeling because let's say you do kill me," at this, Azazel chuckled as if it amused him. "My friend there will blow out the brain of your lover's brother."

Sam follows his gaze. Sure enough, a paled women held a gun against Balthazar's head.

"That's my wife, in case you were wondering."

Sam can't speak, all his energy washing away in that moment. What could he do now?

"Well, in case you were wondering, that's our friend over there." Surprisingly, it was Gabe who spoke next, his voice shaking.

"What-" Azazel's sneer was cut off by the sound of a woman screaming. 

Sam looked over in time to see Bill knocking Azazel's wife out. Balthazar hurrying to grab the dropped gun. 

Azazel looked frightened for a split second, before plastering a mocking smirk across his face.

"Come on Sammy boy, you're no killer."

Sam doesn't bother answering as he punches Azazel once and grabs the gun Gabriel had retrieved from his brother. Then, in one fluid movement, Sam lets Azazel go and shoots him in the head. 

Azazel drops to the ground like a sack of bricks. Sam stands there for a moment, holding the gun in trembling hands. He had just killed someone. Sure, Azazel had been an evil psycho, but it was still a human life that he had taken.

People around them pause, some scream and others simply stare. 

"Sir, I'm gonna have to ask you to come with me-" An officer tries to grab Sam, but Bill steps forward and shakes his head.

"Please, not now, this is far from the right time."

Sam blinks, staring numbly at the fallen body.

The officer splutters. "Excuse me, but murder is an offence-"

"Good God sir, the whole damned ship is about to go under and you're caring about the law?"

The officer has no reply to this and backs off under Bill's glare.

"Sam?" Gabriel lightly touches Sam's arm.

"We need to go," Sam throws the gun overboard. No time to stand here and break down over it.

Balthazar was back on deck with them, and much to Sam's horror the lifeboat was being lowered down towards the water. The ship lurches, a sicking crack sounding from far below. 

"We don't have time, let's go, now!" Sam grabs Gabriel's hand. 

Bill had disappeared after hearing another lifeboat being lower. He said that he had to get his daughter off and Sam honestly didn't blame him. 

"Come on brother, we're getting out of here." Gabriel grabs Balthazar, and with Sam's help, they managed to start dragging him down the deck. 

"We have room for a few more people!" 

Sam perks up at this, God please let them get there in time. He leads them past the musicians playing their mournful tunes, weaving through the crowds and desperate to reach the lifeboat before it could be launched.

"We have room for a few more!" The worker calls again.

Sam pulls Gabe and Balthazar forward, slightly breathless as he spoke. "Please, let us on."

The worker eyes the blood on his jacket. "Sir-"

"Please." Sam felt his heart hammering in his chest, this was it. The moment that could we decide their fate.

"Sir, its women and children only."

"Really?" Sam looks pointedly at the pale man sitting on the lifeboat. "'Cause that certainly is one strange looking women."

The worker stumbles over his next words. "That is, it's not actually- It's none of your business."

"Please, just-" Sam tilts his head towards Balthazar. "My friend's leg is broken."

Now the worker looks at Balthazar, and his face softens with a look of recognition. He obviously knew Balthazar.

"Gah... Fine, hop on quick."

"Thank you, sir," Sam and Gabriel hurry to get Balthazar onto the boat, settling in beside him. 

"That's it for this boat!" The worker cries out, indicating to two more workers. 

The boat wobbles as they start to work at the ropes. 

They were safe, at last. Sam let out a breath of relief as he pulled Gabe into his side. They would be okay, and more importantly, his brother's were safe. 

"I love you Sammy," Gabriel whispers, holding on tight to the taller man.

"Love you too," Sam rests his head on Gabe's as the lifeboat rocked. They were starting to lower.

"Wait! Please for the love of god, don't lower that boat!" A raw voice called out.

The boat jerked to a stop and Sam frowns, hugging Gabriel tighter.

"Please-" The man came into view, crying. "Please take my daughter," Bill held Jo out.

"Sir, as it is we're overcrowded."

"Please, I can't let her die, please take her."

Jo was crying trying to hold onto her father as he held her out to the officer. "No! Daddy!"

The officer looked torn. "I can't-"

"Wait." Sam stood up, feeling the boat rock under him. It was obvious to him that as it was the boat was already pushing it to be able to float. There really was only one obvious solution and by the looks of it, no one else was going to have the balls to do it. 

"Sam, what the hell are you doing?"

Gabriel's scared voice almost broke him. As it was he was fighting back tears as he spoke. 

"Let her take my place."

"Sam... please don't do this, don't play the hero." Gabriel stood up, grabbing Sam's arm. "Let me do it instead, please."

"Sorry, Gabe." Sam pulled Gabriel in for a soft kiss, leaning into Gabe's warmth for one last time. Then, with reluctance, he parts ways and forces Gabriel to sit back down.

Balthazar holds his brother back as Sam looks at Bill. 

"Please, let her take my place."

"Thank you, oh god have mercy on your soul, thank you!" A sobbing Bill hands Jo to Sam. 

"Daddy!" Jo was crying, kicking and wriggling in an attempt to escape Sam's clutches.

"I love you, honey, just please sit down, for your pa."

Sam places a still crying Jo where he had sat only seconds before.

"Sammy, don't do this." Gabriel struggled against his brother's grasp.

Sam sucks in a deep breath. He silently apologizes to Gabriel, no longer able to speak as he hurries to shrug his jacket off. He drapes it around Gabe's shoulders, knowing he wouldn't need it much longer. 

Then, he carefully steps across the gap and onto the sinking ship.

"Sammy! Please don't do this!" Gabriel's cries follow him. 

Sam bites his lips, willing the tears to stay at bay as he looks back at Gabe. 

"Sam!" Gabriel was struggling against Balthazar's hold. "No! Let me go!"

Balthazar met Sam's eyes, nodding in respect.

Then, the boat started to be lowered once more.

"Sam!" Gabriel's broken cries rip through Sam's heart like millions of tiny bullets. 

The boat slowly disappears out of sight, and with it goes the cries from Gabriel. Sam shivers, feeling the last of his hope disappear with that boat.

"I'm so sorry, Gabe." Sam turns, finally letting the tears fall as he heads for the musicians. There would be no more boats that would take him, not while women and children still remained on board. And there was, too many. It broke his heart to see just how many frightened children remained. Their fate had been sealed too, there wouldn't be enough lifeboats to save them. Not now.

"Sam-" It was Bill, he had followed Sam. "Man, I just- I just wanted to thank you."

Sam nods, unable to speak.

"I mean, my little girl, she would have died without you, so thanks."

Patting Bill on the shoulder, Sam stands and stares out at the water while listening to the music. It wouldn't be long now. All they could do was wait, so Sam decided to make use of what little time he had left and hunted down a pen and paper. 

Then he wrote two letters. He handed these to the last women to board the last lifeboat, thanking her as she promised to have these delivered.

Then he went back to Bill. The two of them stood near the band and waited, watching as the people left around slowly accepted there fate. 

"Samuel, care to join us for a last smoke?" It was Crowley, Michael and Kevin close behind.

"Going out in style?" Sam eyed their tuxedos.

"Might as well, greet death with dignity and style." Crowley smiled, handing both Sam and Bill cigars. "Now, let us make a toast, to life."

The group light and raise their cigars, "to life."

\------

It happened not even 10 minutes later, the time on his watch reading 2:18 am. First came the noise, loud and sharp in the morning air. Then, the ship started to tilt. 

The band stopped playing, dropping their instruments in an attempt to grab hold of something. People fell over, things started sliding down the deck. His group snub the ends of their cigars, grim and knowing looks on their faces. Their time was up.

Some, Sam, Crowley and Bill included, started to run to the front of the ship, unwilling to meet their deaths too soon, just wanting a few more moments in the world. Others, such as Michael and Kevin, just give in.

Sam breathed out shakily, grabbing onto the chilled railing as he pulled himself up the increasingly tilted deck. His body still ached from Azazel's attack, and each step was more painful than the last.

Bill helped him, grabbing his arm and heaving him up the last bit. The boat tilted a bit more, almost perpendicular now.

Crowley hung from nearby, but Sam could see his grip was starting to slip. Crowley looked down with the look of a condemned man.

"Well, boys looks like this it it." And then, he fell. 

Sam closed his eyes. He could fell the tug of gravity, the rush of air as the ship, with a final groan, finally sunk into the cold waters below. He kept his eyes closed through all this, ignoring the screams and cries of those around him. He didn't pray, however, but he simply held some fond memories close. He thought of those that he loved most, and in his final moments, he smiled. Dean, Adam and Gabe were there with him, smiling lovingly back. 

And then, the inky black water enveloped him. Darkness rushing to greet him like an old friend. The unsinkable ship had met its cold doom.


	10. Ten

April 28th  
12:30 pm

Gabriel held the small box close. It held only a few items, among them was a letter. Gabriel had the other letter in his back pocket, the one addressed to him. He had been reluctant to clean the jacket that he currently wore, despite it being several sizes too large. He hadn't wanted it to lose the familiar smell of his lover. 

He hesitated at the front gate. Would he be able to do this? He nervously ran a thumb over the lid of the box, what would he even say?

The house was quaint, small and a cheerful yellow in colour. Did they know yet?

Gabriel took a steadying breath, he had to do this. He steps through the gate, which squeaked on its rusted hinges and slowly walked up the front path. He could do this, he had to. For Sam.

He raises a hand, softly knocking on the wooden door. There was a moment of silence, then footsteps ran towards the door. It swings open to reveal a small boy who looked up at him with a toothy smile. Of course, this smile quickly disappeared. Obviously, the boy had hoped he was someone else, Sam.

"Who are you?" The boy tilts his head.

Gabe closed his eyes briefly. God this kid looked so much like Sam, it hurt to even look at him.

"I-I'm a friend of Sam."

"Sammy? Is he here!?" The little boy, whose name Gabriel recalled to be Adam, looked past Gabriel's legs.

"Uh-"

"Adam! What have I told you about answering the door..." A taller man came over, his green eyes instantly settling on Gabriel with a frown. Then, this frown dropped into a gutted look as he saw the jacket that Gabe wore. 

"Sammy...?"

Gabriel swallowed thickly. They didn't know.

Dean opened the door wider, letting him in and they all moved to the living room.

"I'm... I'm Gabriel Novak, I was a good f-friend of Sam's."

"Was," Dean echoes, defeat sounding in his voice. 

Gabriel runs a hand down his face, his emotions getting the best of him for a moment. 

"What happened? We heard the ship went down but hoped..." Dean stops to take a shaky breath. "He- He promised."

Gabriel shook his head. "He was on the life- lifeboat with us," he had to stop for a moment, squeezing his eyes shut as more tears threatened to fall. "But, there was this li-little girl, her pa tried getting her onto the boat but there was no room-" This was even more painful than Gabe had feared it would be.

"Where's Sammy?" Adam spoke up, his young face looked so broken. 

"He, well you see, he gave up his spot, so that little girl could get on."

Dean nods slowly, "that's Sammy for you, always putting others first." His voice betrayed his emotions even as he kept his face stoic.

Adam's face falls upon realizing what Gabriel had been saying. Then he starts to cry. "He said he'd come home."

God that just about set Gabriel off crying again.

"He uh, he wrote a letter for you and sent it down on the last lifeboat to escape." Gabriel handed the small box over.

In it, along with the letter, he had put whatever possessions of Sam's he could find in the jacket pockets. This had been his 'lucky' lighter that he said Dean had given him for his birthday, a small handful of money, a small folded up drawing that Adam had obviously made him and finally, a creased photo of the three boys as kids with their parents.

Dean doesn't speak a word as he looks through these items. It was when he unfolded and started reading the letter that he finally broke, crying silently.

"Dammit Sammy," he whispers.

"I'm so sorry," Gabriel whispers, looking down at his hands. "I tried to have her take my place instead but Sam..."

"That's Sam for you, always putting others before himself."

Adam sniffles, wiping at the tears that fell from his eyes. "So... Sammy's not comin' home?"

Dean pulled the small boy in against his side. "No Adam, he isn't."

Adam's expression cuts through Gabriel's heart. 

"I'm sorry-" Gabriel stood up abruptly, unable to sit there any longer. 

He runs out of the room, ignoring Dean's calling after him as he opens the front door and jumps down the front steps. 

"Wait!" Dean had followed him out.

Gabriel pauses, turning around to tell Dean that he should go when he caught sight of something in Dean's hand.

"Look, if you're really Sam's good friend, then I reckon that he would have liked you to have this, y'know, to remember him by," Dean smiled sadly, handing the small picture to Gabe.

Gabriel took it, sure enough, it was a photo of Sam that had probably only been taken a few months ago. In the photo, a black and white Sam smiled back, his eyes crinkled in laughter.

"I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you to go through what you did," Dean places a hand on Gabe's shoulder. "But I'm sure that you and Sam had some great times before..."

Gabriel nods, "yeah, he was a good person, not a great dancer... but a good person."

Dean chuckles softly, "yeah Sam didn't have what you would call dancing legs so much, but he has- had a good heart."

"He really did," Gabriel whispers now, looking down. Should he mention Azazel?

No, Gabriel took one look at Dean's broken expression and decided that there was no point in opening past wounds.

"Thank you, Gabriel, this means a lot that you came here."

"Of course," Gabriel murmurs. "Just, look out for yourself and the kid, alright?"

Dean nods, his eyes holding an impossible sadness. 

With that, Gabriel turns and walks out through the front gate. 

\---------

Gabriel sat on the end of the jetty, a bottle of bourbon next to him and the letter in his hands. The photo Dean gave him sat safely in the pocket of Sam's jacket. 

He could still remember that night. Sitting in the lifeboat, shivering and terrified as he made his voice raw crying for Sam. Balthazar had kept trying to calm him down, but nothing he did could calm the hysterical Gabe. 

It hadn't been much long after that the ship had finally sunk. Gabriel had screamed out Sam's name at that moment, watching the ship disappear into the black water. 

Jo had started crying for her dad again then. 

It was after they had been picked up by another ship that he had been tracked down by a somber-looking woman who had given him the letter. 

He looked down at the letter now, rereading it for the hundredth time, taking a swig of bourbon.

Gabriel

Honestly, I do not expect to get off this ship now, not when there are so many women and children that remain. As I write this, I watch a father try to explain to his daughter why the first class child will survive and how she will not and I cannot believe that that is how things are.... but words won't be able to express my anger so let's move on.

I'm so so sorry, I know we talked about what we'd do when we got to New York and I'm just sad to think about how we'll never get to find out now.  
Honestly, I can't explain what it was between us. I can barely understand how it only took 4 days to feel so strongly about you. How that happened, I'll never know, but I do know that I am so glad that we did have what we had, no matter how brief. 

I wish that we could have had longer together, but unfortunately, the world seems to be against us... still I hope that you know that as I sit here with Bill watching the musicians play, I'm thinking of the future we could have had.

Maybe, in another life, we could have had a chance to be happy together. I like the thought of that.

So, once more, I'm sorry for doing this, but you know that I would never let a little kid die.

I love you Gabe (and yes I know that some would say that that's impossible to feel in such a short time), but I do, love you and I'm so happy with what time we did have.

Goodbye.

Love, your Samoose.

Gabriel sniffs, taking another swig of bourbon. Maybe, in another life, they could have had a chance. And who knows? Maybe they could have had a great love, and maybe they would have parted ways.

All Gabriel knew was that he was damn glad that he had the pleasure to know Samuel Winchester.

"Hey brother, you okay?" Balthazar came up behind Gabe, taking a seat next to him.

Gabriel nods, carefully folding the letter up and putting back in the pocket of the jacket.

Balthazar takes the bourbon, having a swig. "To Sam Winchester, possibly the bravest man I know."

Gabriel takes the bourbon off him, nodding. "Amen, to Sam." He raises the bottle to the ocean before downing some.

And so the people who escaped the terrible fate of the Titanic all held the silent promise that they would forever honor the many people that had been condemned to lie forever at the bottom of the icy ocean. Dead, but not forgotten. And Gabriel would always be admit that Sam had been the bravest of all.


	11. Epilogue

Many, many years later

Gabriel Novak sat in his hospital bed, smiling happily despite the many machines that surrounded him. His family, larger than ever, sat around him. They were all happy to help him celebrate his 80th birthday. 

Gabriel himself had never married, he had never had the chance to kids. Whenever someone asked him why this was, he simply said he had no time for it. The look in his eye said differently. 

One thing he did have, however, was nieces, nephews and their many children - oh, and of course his many brothers and sisters. So, on that day, Gabriel was content with life, after all, it was only right that he should live it to its fullest after surviving something as dreadful as the Titanic's sinking.

To many, that disastrous event was now no more than a mere memory, to others, it was something they learned in history class. To him, it remained in his brain clear as day, haunting his dreams. 

He looks over at his side-table as Lucifer told everyone an embarrassing story from Gabriel's childhood. The now old and very creased photo of Sam sat there, in a new frame that Balthazar had brought him only a year ago. 

Sam, Gabriel couldn't wait to see him again. He longed to have those strong, warm arms wrapped around him, to kiss his moose like man again. It wouldn't be long now.

"Gabriel was a little shit as a kid." Lucifer grinned.

"And you weren't?" Gabriel wheezes, winking playfully at the children. 

Lucifer wasn't in a much better state than Gabriel, but somehow he had made it to an impressive 84 years of age and was still kicking. Lucky fellow.

Unfortunately, Balthazar had passed only three months ago, his death still hurt Gabriel whenever he thought of it. Well, he guessed it wouldn't be long until he saw him either. This cheered him up to an extent. 

There was a long pause before his next breath, he panicked. It felt like he was being smothered. 

"Gabey?" His younger brother, Castiel grabbed his hand. 

Lucifer and Samandriel usher the young ones out of the room. They couldn't see this.

So Gabriel sat there, surrounded by his loving brothers who all held onto him as he took one last breath. The last conscious thought he has is that of Sam as he looks over at the photo.

And then Gabriel Novak was gone.

~~~~~~

Gabriel woke to a warm pair of arms being thrown around him.

"Gabey!" It was Balthazar, looking as he had decades ago. "I feared it wouldn't be long."

Gabriel smiles, hugging his brother back. "I missed you Balthy." His voice sounded deeper, younger.

"Gabe?" 

Gabriel looks up. Was that? 

Sam stood not far behind Balthazar, a loving smile on his face as he looked at Gabriel. 

"Sammy..." Gabriel ran over, throwing himself into the tall man's arms once more.

"You told my brothers, thank you."

Gabriel chuckles. "That was years ago."

"And yet, you would still visit them every anniversary," Sam kissed his forehead.

"I love you," Gabriel whispers, smiling up at Sam.

"I love you too." And finally, after far too many years of waiting, Gabriel is able to kiss Sam.


End file.
